There are days where it feels like everything that could go wrong does go wrong. That big project your team has been working on has hit a snag. Not a little hiccup. It’s more like a giant pothole in the road. It’s going to take all hands on deck to overcome this hurdle. Yet, one team member, the one that has the most experience in this component of the project, is out with the flu. Another is two days into a 10-day vacation. Then there’s the technology issues. Your laptop isn’t cooperating and you’re (im)patiently waiting for IT to figure out the issue and make it right again. And that’s just the stuff that’s happening at work. That doesn’t even begin to cover the ruckus going on in your personal life.
The stress is, well, it’s overwhelming. You can feel your cortisol levels rising. You’re the leader of this ship and it’s up to you to keep it afloat even as you feel yourself sinking. You may find yourself wondering “Is this what burnout feels like?” How do you get through stretches like this? How do you lead your team through chaos?
It seems counterintuitive, but in the most difficult times, focusing on what is still right and being grateful for it may help decrease the impact of the stressor. Let’s be clear, this doesn’t mean you ignore the challenges you’re facing. They are very real, and they need attention. This is about balancing your attention to also make space to focus on the things that are going right, and to focus on them with gratitude.
When we’re in the storm, it’s natural to settle our focus on the broken pieces. We’re trying to solve problems, so of course we’re giving the problems the bulk of our attention. You ruminate and you brace for what comes next.
Yet, real strength is not found in wrapping ourselves in that tight protective shell this approach can build. It can be found in softening just enough to notice what isn’t falling apart and finding gratitude in it. Sometimes it’s not about solving the crisis in front of you. It’s about remembering that not everything is a crisis and there is still good, solid, dependable strength in what is going right.
This bears repeating: when we fixate on all that is going wrong, our mindset becomes “Everything is wrong!” We lose perspective. The reality is that even in the midst of chaos, something is still working right.
We might be on the battlefield of business, but our team is clicking like a well-oiled machine, and we are working in sync to identify the core issues and create solutions. Our tech may be glitchy in the office, but we’ve got the flexibility to change workspaces and access cloud-based tools from different tech in different places… including that one cute coffee shop with the chai latte that makes your soul sing a little every time you sip it.
Finding the sweet spots and holding them in gratitude puts you back in control. You aren’t going along for the ride wherever your stress wants to take you. You are aware of the challenges, and you are aware of the high points. Even if the only gratitude you can muster at the moment is a good cup of coffee and the crumb cake Joe from Accounting left in the breakroom for everyone to try, you have something to be grateful for. It’s a start.
Even the smallest sliver of genuine gratitude can physiologically and psychologically lower your cortisol levels. It puts you back in the driver’s seat of your own nervous system. You’re no longer being hijacked by fear. You’re grounding yourself in reality, not just the painful parts. The whole balanced truth helps calm and focus you in a way that opens the door to clarity of thought and energy to meet the tasks before you head-on.
If your perception of a good leader involves stoicism and a superhuman ability to navigate the ups and downs of business and life, you need to adjust your expectations. We lead successfully without losing ourselves. It’s not about being superhuman. It’s being more intentionally human.
It’s okay to admit that you don’t have all the answers. To be real and honest, to say that this moment challenges you. In fact, being humble enough to admit you don’t have all the answers and human enough to experience the emotions that come with that, makes you a better leader when it is coupled with the hunger to seek the solutions.
Seeing the small spots of good in the midst of challenges keeps you focused and moving forward. It reminds you that this isn’t the space you’ll stay in. It’s a temporary storm with success on the other side of it. Recognizing you can’t fix it all on your own is the start of finding the solution as a team.
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